I feel alone~

Well you know all those times whenever ur down or sad there is always someone who would eventually say that they would be there for you? Yea same happened to me as I simply can't remember all those people who actually said that to me. Buthen whenever I really am in need of someone to actually make me feel better or by just having someone around, nobody is every around!!

Hey it's not like you could actually go and meet anyone just because your upset right? Sigh.

And what happens is that when called or sms, everyone is so busy with their own life and own stuffs that sometimes I end up wondering if they even care whether I'd be alive or dead.... But let's just say that it's they who is having the problem.......

Look at how they'd be chasing me and would get so pissed off that I couldn't be there. What am I? Some emotion-less human or wait! Am I even a human to begin with? *smack head*

At times I just feel like I wanna break free at any costs. No matter what ever way am sorry but that's how I feel. Wishing upon the star for an angel to grab ma soul away~ Sigh.....

All I want is just some care... Am I asking too much? Though there are a few people who actually LOVE to know what is actually going on with me so they could practically beat me down even more than I already am....

The above pic is how I exactly feel. I've been faking as if I am happy and all but actually I feel like I am just dying slowly inside. I wanna let go of it. But HOW?!!

Everytime I just feel almost snapping at someone for even small issues. Sometimes feel like just wanna go bang my head on the wall for no reason or even worst feel like strangling ownself. T____T

I need a break. Someone kindly save me.... Even a day would do....

Tough Times Ahead~

Well been kinda shocked that I do have a few people who actually support my blog! Thank you!! Thank you people!! =)

Anyways, it's been a tough beginning of the week for me as my probation in my company was extended and all in all now i hear from my management side that my career would depend on how my drama goes!

I mean wtf?! My career as a customer service rep is going to be based on a freaking drama?!

To make things even better for me, the drama team is simply "CHAOS!". Everyone with their own plans, their ideas, their own egos all wanting to be the 1 to run the show. Why didn't I just back down? Somehow I do have this feeling that things are going be more tougher for me from now on.

Yesterday was already so bad that I was madly stressed to the extend that I pulled my papa, to go makan satay all of a sudden!! OMG!! I missed those satay so badly as I used to have it quite often before. So after then got even more stressed so ended up in Club 9 to listen to some beats and watched WWE.

Thank god that actually helped but total damage for the night was RM50. >.<

Yea I know RM50 is not that much but for just lazying around that seemed alot... LOLX

But can't be doing so every night though... Now just got off work gonna go for drama practice. Yet still am hoping that things would work out 1 way or another. Hope if there is any such left. Sigh...

Ma New Baby Brotha~

I've been wanting to blog about this for quite some time but couldn't manage to find any time as there has been alot of stuffs to be done at work... Anyways here is the new casanova~

Yep, that's him! Ain't he cute!! Born on the 6th of July he falls nicely between his parent's birthdays which is on the 4th for ma papa, Clinston Ho and 8th July for ma mama, Hannah Chin Mei Fong. Sorry papa I dunno your full name.... =P

Well I rushed of work to witness his birth but eventually only managed to catch it later than I actually wanted and there he was lying on his bed cutely....

Sorry for the bad quality pic as me and ma papa were so Kan-Cheong overdosed that we didn't have any cameras by us. LOL. But anyways there he was surrounded by a few other babies.

I felt my heart race when i saw him! I dunno why of cz but it was such a nice feeling i had. Though am yet to carry him, am looking forward for his full moon party thats coming up! While I get my pics for the event, below are more pics of this handsome baby~

I was shocked myself when I actually saw this too... He is just few days old but already knows to show his tongue... LOL

Poor fella needs to be tied up as he is kinda strong for his age... always manages to push out his hands so needed to tie him down! XD

Well that's about it for now people! Enjoy reading as more exiting stuffs are coming up next week as there is full moon party for this fella here and also my company's event night on the 31st! My direction and also script drama is gonna be happening as well...!! Stay tuned guys!! XD

9 Deadly Words~

I was kinda browsing around my facebook when i actually came across this article which i am not sure was for joke or if it was for real about the words that women use with double meanings.

I mean of course for most guys its kinda confusing when you don't really get it and end up making things worst than it already is. Even me tend to get the wrong translations for what my baby says sometimes and really regret it. Though of course 1 word that I'd certainly know what it means is when she says "u like ar" which means she ain't happy.

Below is the note that i found from the site that i saw this. Take a look and for guys, this could be a turning point in ur relationship as you might understand certain things about ur girl more better. =D






Cheers people!! More posts are coming up as been wanting blog for quite some time but work load was over my head so couldn't find the time to blog at all... Finally its sunday!! XD

Angels cry~

Recently while i was doing my work at this mamak i kinda got stuck with this song by Mariah Carey and Neyo titled as Angels Cry. The song was so good that its stuck to my head and prompted me to look for the lyrics!

Mariah:
I shouldn't have walked away
I would've stayed if you said
We could've made everything OK
But we just
Threw the blame back and forth
We treated love like a sport
The final blow hit so low
I'm still on the ground

I couldn't have prepared myself for this fall
Shattered in pieces curled on the floor
Super natural love conquers all
'Member we used to touch the sky
And

Lightning don't strike
The same place twice
When you and I said goodbye
I felt the angels cry
True love's a gift
We let it drift
In a storm
Every night
I feel the angels cry

C'mon babe can't our love be revived
Bring it back and we gon' make it right
I'm on the edge just tryin' to survive
As the angels cry

Ne-Yo:
I thought we'd be forever and always
You were serenity
You took away the bad days
Didn't always treat you right
But it was OK
I do somethin' stupid
And you still stay with me

But you can only go for so long
Doing the one you claim to love wrong
Before too much is enough
You look up
Find your love gone
And

We were so good together
How come we could not weather
This storm and just do better
Why did we say goodbye

'Cause lightning don't strike
The same place twice
When you and I said goodbye
I felt the angels cry
True love's a gift
We let it drift
http://www.elyricsworld.com/angel_cry_lyrics_mariah_carey_ft_ne-yo.html
In a storm
Now every night
I feel the angels cry

Mariah & Ne-Yo:
C'mon babe can't our love be revived
Bring it back and we gon' make it right
I'm on the edge just tryin' to survive
As the angels cry

Baby I'm missin' you
Don't allow love to lose
We gotta ride it through
I'm reaching for you

Baby I'm missin' you
Don't allow love to lose
We gotta ride it through
I'm reaching for you

Lightning don't strike
The same place twice
When you and I said goodbye
I felt the angels cry
True love's a gift
But we let it slip
In a storm
Every night
I feel the angels cry

Oh babe, the angels cry


Personally i think the song is brilliant! The lyrics, the singers, the music everything!

FML gao gao~

Gosh I thought I could finally get some extra rest when I finally managed to get back early around almost 9pm. Then talked to my baby awhile and since she was going out soon after that didn't really get much chance to talk much so I just headed to bed.

My wish of wanting to have atleast a proper sleep was halted as I had dreams of dead zombies, dead people, murders and so on. Obviously I got scared and woke up. Thought wanna check if my baby was around or not since it was 4am and past few days she's been awake that timing.

Tried sms no reply, tried calling no answer. So i was left there sitting alone in my dark cold room too scared to sleep as I do have a habit of having re-occurrence or continue-ing dreams. That's one thing that was very disturbing as images of my dream was always around me.

Though i did feel tired was kinda too awake till it was already starting to become bright! Then I realised it was already 7.30am! Fuck! Too late even if I wanted to sleep so i just got up took a super duper 45 mins long shower to soothe myself.

Then was already on the way to work. Yet still, the images are hunting me. Hated it so so much. Want some pampering to soothe my feelings... T___T

Where is my baby? T___T Want ma baby~

been away~

So sorry couldn't really blog at all recently since I am in training and wouldn't get much chance to update much after training done also cz in training for 31st July performance for my company!

For the readers, who are actually supporting thank you very much for the support given but hold on because I will be back with more interesting posts! Including the birth of my bro, Ricardo Ho on the 6th July!!

Updates coming up soon guys!! Hang on!!

FML over and over again

I feel so lethargic and tired after a long day. I was already feeling unwell when I woke up not to forget the feeling of emptiness and deprived that I've had since waking. Came to office hoping things are okay and kinda took my mind of my warning from my boss already.

As i walked pass his door to get my punch card, he called me and started saying that I am taking things for granted and giving excuses as I have been going out to party and have problem waking up in the morning!!

I was like wtf?! I couldn't believe what was actually being said as it was really unexpected. To make things worst he actually throws me a documented paper saying that I was late and I had to sign it. T___T

So pissed I was that I really felt like breaking his face for saying it. So I asked him where he heard it from and he just go like I made a research about your background last saturday! I couldn't help but to start laughing and though he had a puzzled face he still wanted to have the last laugh by saying that 1 more lateness and I need a new job ady.

So I just said that he'd got the wrong person as the last I went club was during my bday which is in Feb!! And the last I drank was with my gf and thomaz!! He was like don't give me all those stories so I said I am heading to go do my work as I realized he ain't listening.

As if that's not enough, been sick and doctor doesn't seem to know what's wrong with me. T___T

Took my blood samples and report out tomorrow oni. He checked me and except for a mild fever, he said am fine! But i complained saying am having body ache and feeling weird. He then just gave me some meds and asked me to come back tomorrow as he doesn't know what's wrong with me!!! T_____T

Lucky it's covered with insurance!! If not sure dead as that little visit's bill was about RM60!! Damn fuck expensive though he didn't really do anything!!! Beh-song-ness to the max!!!!

Urbanscape part 2~

Well the other day just posted bout urbascapes but I saved the best for the last...

Well the I totally enjoyed the part when we went to watch the bands perform.. With Kae, 1 of my baby's friends who went with us. Thanks to her I did not regret it at all!!

1st of was....

They were just awesome!! Below are more pics from them!!

They were cool plus not to forget the violonist!! XD That was damn cool though I don't really know any of their songs, I really enjoyed listening to them. It was damn cool!! Prolly the best performance I saw that day.

The came another band Rosevelt.

They were not bad to begin with though not really a huge fan of their music, it was ok.

Before Rosevelt though, there was another band that performed which kinda reminded me of Yui, the Jpop star. They kinda had alot of similarities.

Their performance was kinda good too... Loved them!! XD

Then there was a project called Project 'Angkat Rumah' which was kinda cool too...

And right before we left that was our last pit stop. It was damn funny with a weird half chicken was dancing like nobodies business with some other people and even some aunties joined in and danced!! It was damn cool but by the time we guys reached here we were tired so we just headed back as suposely we were waiting for the sunset disco to begin but they kinda delayed the start so just went off....

Well thats all about what I've got about urbanscapes for now. Well am really looking forward for next year's edition!! Hope that we guys could prepare well for it!! XD


That's all for now!! Special thanks to my baby darling again for lending me her pics... If got time do visit her blog at http://alletsstella.blogspot.com/

Ciaos people!!! XD

~We are humans too~

I've been wondering lately, is there any NGO or Government Bodies that actually provide a certain kinda protection for Customer Service agents. By the way, I am a customer service rep for FedEx.

Even when I just joined in, nobody actually said it's a good choice as they said the job is terrible. But after coming here, I realized that the job is a wonderful job but the treatments that we are given is what I rather call as terrible.

I bitterly disappointed with how things are. I mean customer service agents are humans too. Eventually when a customer is abusive, the most a customer service rep could do is end the call and yet still they'd get into trouble and the best of all is even when they don't end the call they'd still get into trouble for having complains coming againts them.

People eventually treat customer service reps worst than dogs sometimes. Then how are we supose to expect to receive a good treatment from customer service reps when we call in? This is logical enough for anyone to understand. But still some might say that they didn't do anything wrong but imagine, customer service reps answer a whole lot of calls a day and whether good or bad customers they still provide their service.

Yet still yea i agree its still their job to do so, but think about it. Some people eventually call into customer service because they are bored!! WTF?! That's not it, customer can simply call and use abusive language or whatsoever and go off without anything. While the customer service agents have suck up to it and continue on as if nothing happened.

Why is there no campaigns or atleast a group that acutally fights for customer service rights? Even my company which eventually says employees come 1st, don't even have anything to protect us. All they say is deal with it because they are customers. I mean the saying "customer is always right" could be rational at times but not all the time.

As i see it, am worried that in the next 5 years, customer service agents would not even be given a normal human rights. I know i might sound dramatic but the way things are seems like that right? So i was telling my boss about my experience with 1 customer who eventually hurt me with what he said, and all he said was,
"oh he ar, He is always like that. You can't say anything about it."

And i was like, WTF?! What's with that reply? I know customer service rep means dealing with all sorts of people but still abusive behavior is not supose to be supported right?

I am really disappointed that we are in such a modern world at the moment but people are still not educated about customer service. As when you want a good service, you have to be provide a good service 1st right? Same like the saying goes, "give respect to earn respect" and isn't that true enough?

Totally FML

I was on the phone with my baby at 4am and she asks me to go sleep cz worried that i might not be able to wake up at 6am to go work. But eventually i ended up waking by 6am and got bus finally at 8am! And when i thought that yet still i could make it to work early, I sat in relax and suddenly as the bus was moving into Federal Highway, it stops with the engine smoking!

0.0!!! I was like "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!" Cz i already had few times when due to stupid public transport, being late to work and thats really upsetting. So I waited for taxi while frantically dialing my colleague's numbers as well as trying to reach my boss to tell them of the situation!!

That's when people tend not to pick up your call!! I was like why the fuck these people need to have phone and ended up getting through to 1 of my colleague at 8.45am. Mind you was trying to call since 8.15am. Plus due to the strategic place of my bus' stop, there wasn't any cabs who was willing to stop. I was already pissed, depressed, tired, and heartbroken, and panicking! So I called my another boss, Ms Yen. Tell her my problem as I started to walk towards Subang Parade and she eventually told me it's ok.

Yet still I was very disappointed in myself and worst was the attitude of taxi drivers as they eventually either put a price tag of RM30 or they say that area not convenient! So with my heart racing I caught a cab nearby subang parade and I felt so relieved as I was gonna pass out due to out off breathe!

Thank god he was kind and friendly atleast something after such a struggle and I eventually only paid like RM15! Half the price that was even put out by the other cab drivers!! Damn wtf?!

Is there any way that those irresponsible cab drivers to be punished for their behavior? Plus its like cab drivers call the shot on the price and which way they want to go rather than the customer. Unless this is being sorted out, we are certainly going to fall back on public transportation side as even most the cabs that are running around are like gonna break down anytime while they charge like mad! Sigh really FML day today....

Urbanscapes!

After a huge fuss to cover my working hours to get the average 44hours a week so managed to "gao tim" with my boss and managed to be able to cover an hour a day from Monday - Thursday as Saturday is halfday so covered my 4 hours on those days.

So yea after a terrible work day on Friday wasn't really in high expectations for the Urbanscapes as last year I was still lost at the event because my sayang actually brought me to know of it. So this year was hoping things would be a little more exiting and so kinda booked some time to go with ma baby.

I certainly had no regrets at all as it was awesome!!! Below are some pics I stole from my baby darling collection as I am yet to have a camera of my own yet....

It was so nice plus there were a lot of new things that was going on!! Plus the whole atmosphere was awesome though of course the weather wasn't something who was my best buddy... =(

Then we moved further and in, and gues what we saw! Some cool music DJ-ing kinda thingy that was kinda cool yet weird... Below are some of the pics!

All the people were so fascinated by the whole set up that people were like surrounding that place the whole time it was going on!! Even an aunty jumped in to play with it!! She was enjoying it like mad siao!! Then there was Dustyhawk, or dunno what his real name is though who seemed to be the most enthusiastic player of the "i dunno what to call it" equipment!! XD


Well for now these are the few pics that I got to fit in here. Would find more time to get the rest of the updates soon!

Special thanks to my baby sayang who let me grab her pics for this blog... Do visit her as well at http://alletsstella.blogspot.com

Till the next post!! Tata!!